Sexual orientation is one aspect of every person’s identity, regardless of whether that person is heterosexual, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, or Questioning. Although most people do not realize it, the societal assumption that all people are heterosexual reveals itself in our communication and interpersonal interactions all the time. How sexual orientation is talked about – or not talked about – impacts the environment in which we interact. These guidelines provide some suggestions for creating a work or social environment that is more open, comfortable, respectful, and welcoming for people who are Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, or Questioning(LGTBQ).

• Treat the topic of sexual orientation as you would any other human difference.
• Use inclusive, non-gender specific language that does not assume heterosexuality in coworkers, colleagues, or students. Modify your language by:
  
          1.       Using inclusive terms such as partner or date, instead of spouse, wife,
                    husband, boyfriend, or girlfriend.
  
          2.       Using inclusive terms such as committed relationship instead of
                    marriage.
  
          3.       Using pronouns that are neutral and do not assume the sex of
                    someone’s partner, such as person, someone, anyone.
• Avoid making assumptions about people’s sexual orientation based on their appearance or behavior.
• Do not assume all unmarried people are single or have opposite sex relationships.
• Do not assume all mothers and fathers are heterosexual, or that all children live in families consisting of a male-female couple.
• Ask individuals what terminology they prefer when you are referring to them or talking with them. Be sensitive about words to use and not use based on individual preferences.
• Learn the definitions of words associated with the LGBTQ community. Do no use slang in a pejorative or derogatory manner to describe someone’s sexual orientation.
• Make efforts to be inclusive of LGBTQ coworkers’ or colleagues’ family lives, partners, or social activities in casual conversation.
• Discourage others from telling jokes about people who are LGBTQ and refrain form telling them yourself. Do not joke or tease someone for nontraditional gender behaviors.
• Refuse to tolerate derogatory or anti-LGBTQ remarks, actions, jokes, or name calling.
• Refrain from using judgmental language that will create barriers.
• If you want to know something about someone’s sexual orientation, ask them directly, rather than asking others. Understand that some individuals who are LGBTQ may be defensive or shy due to past negative experiences or fears related to telling people about their sexual orientation. Try to understand and not take it personally . Keep in mind that some people, regardless of sexual orientation, tend to share personal information only when asked; others prefer not to share such information. Respect their individual right to privacy even when you ask a sincere question.
• Remember that while people who are LGBTQ share the experience of being different from the societal norm in their sexual orientation, there are many differences among individuals who identify as LGBTQ. Their backgrounds, experiences, and lifestyles vary widely.  People who are LGBTQ come from all different cultural, racial, ethnic, religious, and socioeconomic groups. 
• When someone shares information with you about their sexual orientation, clarify with them whether or not this is information they want you to keep confidential. For many, sexual orientation is not a personal matter but is considered a status, much like gender, nationality, or race. But given the socio/political issues and the negative consequences that do exist for many, allowing a person the opportunity to have decide about disclosure is best.
• Do not assume that the sexual orientation of a person who is LGBTQ is the most important aspect of that person, or the only topic they will want to talk about. Remember that everyone is a multifaceted individual who sexuality is one aspect of his or her total life.

Adapted from “Ways You Can Be Sensitive About Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity to Enhance Workplace Communications” through NIU SZP